Six Secret Gifts Mom Really Wants

Mother’s Day is just around the corner. I know, we just wrapped up that other holiday and your chocolate bunny barely has his ears bitten off yet, but it’s time to start thinking about mom.

My credentials as an expert in what moms want lie in the fact that I am mom of seven. I have five of my own, two step kids I consider my own, and two in heaven. I have boys about whom I daily wonder if they’ll survive til their next birthdays, girls who still have a lot to learn about life, and a baby who has a very long way to go. I’ve been a mom for 11 years now, but with step children, I already have teenagers in the house. I also have a mom, grandmother and sister. I’ve been through infertility struggles, a divorce, single parenting, step-mothering, homeschool mothering… I’ve been loved and hated, ignored, and doubted. If there’s a mom road, I’ve probably traveled it for some stretch of the way. As a result I think I have a pretty good idea those secret things moms really want for Mother’s Day.

Here’s My List of Six Secret Things Moms Really Wants:

  1. Prayers. Being a mom is a daily struggle, constant battles with self, disobedience, pride and keeping priorities right. It take humility, sacrifice, creativity, and energy – lots of energy. Keeping up that pace is impossible without God. This Mother’s Day, pray for moms you know that God’s sufficiency will be evident in their lives, that they will experience peace, that they will know God’s grace and mercy and feel His presence. Pray for patience, energy, rest, comfort, confidence, wisdom, and more wisdom. Moms need prayers.
  2. A mom-cation. We love our kids and we loving being with you and helping you, teaching you, coaching you, fixing things for you, cooking for you, cleaning for you, but in the end, we basically work around the clock. Everyone deserves a break now and then and mom is no different. Maybe you can only bear to go without her for an hour or two, or maybe you can send her away for a week, but however long and whatever form it takes, from pedicure to cruise to the Bahamas, give mom some time off, either alone or with her friends. And while you’re at it, make sure everything is taken care of at home. She doesn’t want to fear the condition of the house when she returns, or feel guilty about leaving everyone. Make it a real mom-cation!
  3. Gratitude. Being a mom in all its forms is often a thankless job. It’s ok, most of the time, really. We know that the rewards of mothering are more intrinsic and that is awesome, but once in a while, a genuine, heart-felt, specific thank you of the things that mom does for you, how she impacts your existence, is enormous. One day at homeschool coop, the chapel leader asked the kids to say thank you to their moms for something specific. I gotta tell you, those moms were in tears. We, moms, question ourselves, doubt ourselves and fear we are getting it all wrong, so a specific thank you is huge. It is quite possibly the thing mom needs to hear this year.
  4. Load Lighteners. Similar to a mom-cation, but perhaps less extreme, load-lighteners are simple things you can do to make it easier for mom for a specified period of time. Maybe an offer (and follow through) to do all the laundry for one week, to clean up after dinner, or give the kids a bath. These are smaller gestures that let her know you see her, that you understand how much work she puts in and briefly frees her up to explore her own interests, or just take a nap.
  5. Her favorite things. This is an important one. Moms give and give. Their goal is to take care of everyone else, and in the process they often forget who they are. They may feel un-seen, more like a maid than a mother. Small gifts of her favorite flower or plant, her favorite color, her favorite character, her favorite food, a gift card to her favorite restaurant or store. It’s not about the price tag or the item itself, as much as it is a statement that she matters, her likes matter enough for you to know them and remember them. That is why in order to accomplish this gift, you must know her favorite things. If you don’t know them, you have to begin asking in advance in very natural ways so she doesn’t suspect. The surprise factor is awesome.
  6. The Thing She Keeps Putting Off. Maybe it is a gym membership, maybe its a new bike, maybe its a spa day or a patio swing, but it is something specific that you hear her talk about, but she won’t spend the money on it because she puts others first. Get her that.

These are the gifts that make a moms heart sing. If you want her to feel special and beautiful and important and valued, these are the ways to a mom’s heart. It’s not about the price, but rather the value and what it says about her value. Show her how much you value her, how much she means to you, how much you see her.

What about you? What’s on your secret wish list? Are these the things you’d ask for too?

Of course, if you’re looking to buy a gift, here are the things on this mom’s wish list

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